Greetings to you all. I hope you are staying warm and enjoying the New year. I have been feeling it is time for another edition of my ramblings. Last August I was talking about a sword shall pierce your soul. An excellent book for those who have faced job loss and life changing situations.
But since I wrote that blog, so much has changed, yet nothing has changed. I continue to hear from people about things in their lives that have broken them, it continues to be devestating for many. Job loss, health problems, marital breakdown and sucides, and as well attemtped. Recently one of our street friends passed away. I am not sure of the reasons for her passing, other than I know she had lived a life of addiction and it finally took its toll on her.
We all know people who are suffering and it is so important that we reach out to others and give a hand up instead of a hand out. As I continue my own road to recovery and healing, the Lord has shown me so many things about me and the reasons for my job loss and the situation we presently find ourselves in. Even though the reasons for my dismissal were wrong and unjust. God had a plan and I can honestly say I am thankful. There are more reasons everyday to thank Him for it.
1. Because of this hurt. I have a deeper relationship with Him. This has brought me to my knees and made me more dependant upon Him. It has also shown me how loving and kind He is. I also have a deeper relationship with my family and others. My focus has become not so much about me and the insecurity I have lived with my whole life. I see others who live with the same insecurity, others who are struggling with not measuring up. How can I build them up? How can I help them? This has become my mantra as it were.
2. Because so many of us are broken in some way. The hurts of this world and just plain living can wear us down. I have found that the trust and hope in the Lord has brought about a sensitivity to the needs of others in a totally different way. Cindy and I have been praying for a few months now that we would be come the miracle instead of asking for a miracle. So often when we are in dire straits, we run to God on our knees yelling out we need help. We need a miracle! I have done that for years. Since this crisis, through doing devotions, bible reading and listening to preachers on line we have come to the conclusion we need to be the miracle in the life of others. By seeing what God is doing in our lives and the lives of others people who are hurting, who are struggling will see the truth of His unfailing love, forgiveness and acceptance. Even when we feel like we do not measure up.
3. The Lord brought us to a place of dependance. In the books of Acts Paul was about set out on a missionary journey. the passage says that the Holy Spirit restrained them. Through this passage the Lord showed me that the reason for our not returning to Calgary, many of the things we tried to find employment and my working on building another street ministry. These things did not happen, because the Lord was showing us. I would have relied on me and my experience and network of friends. We needed to remain in Vernon and heal and relearn a few things. Also in Genesis when the children were wandering around in the desert for forty years. Every day the Lord provided their food and needs. Every day for forty years! Not tomorrows stuff, because it would rot. So the Lord has shown us that we need to rely on Him for our daily needs. He is providing is such an awesome way. I was working at the church with the youth for a short time, but now I am working at John Howard pretty much six days a week. until the middle of next month. I still dont have a guarrenteed job and we are still walking a fine line. But our bills are getting paid. He is providing.
Finally, I know is some ways none of us will measure up. We are all sinners. Yet the God of love embraces us and wants to hold us and love us. It doesnt matter to Him. He wants us to open up our hearts and allow Him to heal the wounds. He wants us to give to Him our all and be silent for a time so that we can hear Him and know that He loves us.
My words of encouragement to you my friends. A sword did pierce my soul. It wounded me and I still ache, but I can honestly say I am thankful for that piercing. My soul has been changed and I look forward to more healing. My words are meant to help you deal with your own woundedness and know that you are loved and not alone.
One final thought I began a new ministery of sorts. I call it the prayer pokes. You poke me and I pray for you, and when I poke you back all I ask is that you pray for us.
How can God use me to be a miracle in your life?